Wounds As Gateways

What feels like wounds are new parts of you being born.

I write this to share that your relationship to your ‘wounds’ can change.

’Kintsugi’ is the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery by mending the cracks with lacquer that is mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum.
Photo courtesy of: Australian Cultural Fund
  • You might wear shapeless black clothes and get piercings and evil-looking tattoos so that nobody could possibly be attracted to touch you.
  • You might suffocate yourself in a cloud of depression threatening to infect anyone who gets too close to you.
  • You might develop the habit of shredding any offers of intimacy with sharp cutting words rather than enduring the fear that might arise when receiving a hug.
Carrot Nose Breaking training in a Possibility Lab.
  • Your marriage is falling apart because you have not developed the introspection and nonlinear possibility skills that are central to creating real intimacy with your partner.
  1. BECOME AN EDGEWORKER: Practice going to the edge of your Marshmallow Zone (‘comfort zone’) and staying exactly there. This does not mean to be adaptive. This does not mean to give in to other people’s ‘needs’ or ‘wounds’. It means to stay present and awake with your Sword of Clarity held out in front of you. Keep paying attention and breathing, noticing the subtle fluctuations of what is happening within you and around you. Your purpose of staying on the edge is to experience a different quality of intimacy. Standing at the edge keeps you vulnerably present, exactly where intimacy happens. Inside your Marshmallow Zone life is suffocated. You are not vulnerable. You cannot listen, connect, or make moves. Standing at the edge of your Marshmallow Zone, life is electrified. From the edge, you can fly. Do not let the old patterns created by your ‘wound’ take over. Practice negotiating intimacies so that deftly taking care of yourself becomes a more powerful weapon than regarding yourself as being ‘a wounded person’. New territories of intimacy in 5 bodies (5bodies.mystrikingly.com), previously blocked, are now accessible for exploration with a whole new level of integrity and creativity (intimacyjourneyers.mystrikingly.com). You can do this together with other practitioners in a weekly Possibility Team (possibilityteam.mystrikingly.com/) and make it your personal transformational-journey playground.
  2. TAKE ON A NEW SELF-EXPERIENCE Shift your identity from being a ‘barely-defended wounded person’ to being a ‘continuously-born-into-new-parts-and-dimensions Being’. Your new identity shines through ongoingly surfing your transformational processes that we call ‘Liquid States’ (liquidstate.mystrikingly.com/). Losing your previous identity as being a ‘wounded person’ is a necessary part of the ‘death and resurrection show’. This Phoenix-type experience is easy to understand theoretically, but scary to navigate in reality, because you cannot know who you might become. All the strategies that you created for relating with others and ‘safely’ negotiating intimacy are no longer valid without your old identity of ‘being wounded’. Being clueless about how it goes now is the ‘death’. The ‘resurrection’ gains strength through enjoying the freedom-of-movement from integrating your ‘wound’ as part of your birthing process and focusing on applying your new skills.

Gameworld builder, bridgebuilder to next culture, possibility manager while navigating joyfully five body intimacy journeys!